Should women submit? MY RESPONSE!

To submit to anyone less than Christ is difficult in a marriage. Yet it is Christ who commands women to be submissive to their sinful, fallible husbands. In this sense Christ is the silent partner of the marriage. It is hard for a wife to submit when she disagrees with her husband. But when she knows her submission is an act of obedience to Christ and honors Christ, it is much less difficult. ~ R. C. Sproul


On my Facebook page I asked what your beliefs are about submission. I read many different beliefs and opinions, here is my response to it all.

The Word says Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. (Ephesians 5:22-24 KJV). The Word of God is the standard. It is the authority upon which I base my beliefs. This scripture says to submit to the husband as unto The Lord in EVERY THING. Even though there is mutual submission in marriage, she submits to his lead he submits to her need, the wife still has the greater responsibility to submit. The husband should be the final authority in the household.

While it is the hope of most women that the husband seeks and is lead by God and that he ultimately submits to God, that is not always the case. The condition upon which God gave for us to submit is " IN EVERY THING". The Word does not say only submit if you agree, or only submit if it makes you comfortable, or only submit if it benefits you, or only submit if your husband is submitting to God, it says submit in EVERY THING. The only time submission is not required is when what your husband is asking you to do is in direct opposition to the Word of God. SIN!

So many women have become so accustomed to running the household (because many have to), because many men are out of their place which has caused us to get out of ours. This shift has caused us to get away from what God has commanded us to do. And many feel justified because of the nature of the situation they are in. We are breaking down our bodies, causing ourselves unnecessary stress, inviting disease, bringing on heartache and heartbreak, and sending ourselves to a early grave because we are out of place and in some cases not at all willing to be submissive to a man.


Submission is a difficult subject because it makes one "feel" powerless. But being powerless simply means God I give myself totally and completely over to you and I trust you totally with my life and with the heart of my husband. It is most helpful also to remember that I am not submitting to my husband, I am ultimately submitting to Christ! And I submit to Christ because I love Him with my whole heart. My inability to submit to my husband shows my true inability to submit to Christ.

Women are much more powerful than we give ourselves credit for. I know most of you think the power is in the sexual organ between your legs, but that is not what I mean. IF WE DO OUR PART REGARDLESS TO WHAT OUR HUSBAND DOES and fast and pray for our husband we will see change in our marriages beyond belief!!! In my first marriage I submitted only when it was comfortable, or beneficial for me. And I took on far too much of the role of a husband than a wife. When I married the second time over and over my husband and I bumped heads in that same area for the first year. Once I relinquished control, got in my place, lined myself up with the Word of God, fasted and prayed, everything I was "so called" fighting for  began to work in my favor.

PRAYER! PRAYER! PRAYER! PRAYER! PRAYER! That's your power! Do your part regardless to what your husband does! Obey God and leave the consequences to Him! You'll be amazed at the change you'll see.

Breaking the cycle of hurt and anger begins with YOU!

One of the greatest problems in relationships and in the world in general is that people do not take responsibility for their own actions. The first thing that most people do when they "feel" attacked is point the finger and retaliate. The idea that if you kill my dog, I'm gonna kill your cat is an idea that most of us have bought into at one point or another. Most people never realize that the cycle of hurt and anger can be ended with a response of Love. Instead marriages end, relationships are dissolved and homes are destroyed because no one wants to stand up, take responsibility and break the cycle.

In my first marriage my then husband did many things that hurt and disappointed me but what I intended to be ONE act of retaliation ended up lasting for SEVEN years. And resulted in the dissolution of my marriage. How many times have you heard the saying "two wrongs don't make a right"? If your husband treats you wrong and you respond with wrong doing you are both WRONG! And when you stand before God on judgement day He isn't going to ask you what did your husband do to you? He's going to ask how did you respond to it? The Word says in Matthew 5:46 KJV For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same? If you only love those that love you, if you only treat people with Love that treat you with love, if you only love and respect your spouse when he love's and respects you WHERE IS THE REWARD IN THAT? The reward is in Matthew 5:11-12  KJV Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you. We have to get out of our comfort zone and stop being lead by our emotions, stop allowing satan to fool us and rule us. God didn't tell me to retaliate he told me to rejoice. He told me to Love unconditionally just like He Loved me unconditionally.

So many couples would still be together today if they had the Love that God has outlined for us in the scripture. I know so many people that have dealt with infidelity, in there marriage, and they say they cheated because their spouse cheated; he doesn't spend any time with me so I'm not spending any time with him, he doesn't ever do anything I like to do so I'm not doing anything he likes to do, he didn't buy me a gift so I'm not buying him one, he won't help me around the house so I'm not helping him do anything. How can the cycle end if nobody stands up and responds with Love. When will we come to the point that no matter what you do to me, I'm going to do what's right because that's what God told me to do? You' ll be surprised at how your relationship will change. You never know, God may be using YOU to convert your spouses heart. But as long as you both are acting a fool no one sees God in no one. When you respond in Love you teach your spouse how to respond in Love, and when you both are responding to one another in Love then your marriage can grow.


You may say its easier said than done. And you're right it is. Like anything else it takes practice, you have to work at it daily. You also need the power of God, its not something that you can do on your own. Perhaps this visual will help you: You and your husband are arguing and he is being unloving and unkind and you are responding with disrespect and anger, then suddenly just over your husbands shoulder you see Jesus. Would you continue yelling disrespectful, angry words? Regardless to what your husband is saying would you continue or would your attitude change? Did you know that He is standing there all the time? And you know what He is saying? "Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."* No matter what we do, whether good or evil we are not doing it to that person, we are doing it to CHRIST. When you respond to anger, bitterness, unforgiveness, infidelity, disrespect, lies, hurt, unkindness, deception, resentment, evil and negativity with Love, your aren't doing it for that person, you are doing it for Christ out of your LOVE for Christ. We have to pray for Holy Ghost power because we cannot do this of ourselves. It takes the power of God!

Some thoughts and inspirations for this blog post came from: The Love and Respect Experience by Dr. Emerson Eggrichs

*And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. (Matthew 25:40 KJV)

A Valentine's Day Prayer for the broken hearted

Heavenly Father, I pray for the broken hearted. God touch right now those that are searching, needing, and yearning for Love. Comfort the hearts of those that are lonely, and feeling unloved. God restore those marriages that are broken, strengthen that single mother struggling to care for her household all alone, heal that wife that is abused and abandoned, God bring peace to that wife that is waiting for her husband to return from the war, make provision for the wife who's husband is unemployed, be a husband to the single woman and the woman waiting for her husband to Love her as Christ Loves the church. God remove their focus off of this man made holiday and place it on you. Restore the joy, bring peace, elevate faith and fill us with your unconditional Love. Comfort the hearts of these women. I rebuke satan and every chain of bondage he brings! God move on today as never before. Be a comforter, be a healer, be the Lover of our soul, in the matchless name of Jesus! Amen.

Lay down and take it or stand up and fight!

In my quiet time earlier today I was praying and God reminded me of some things I want to share with you. As I've stated before my number one goal is to encourage you to have faith in God no matter what it looks like in your storm. However I keep getting responses like, you don't know how hard it is, you don't know what I have been through. Well I beg to differ. At age 18 I got pregnant in my first semester of college, and 4 months after my son was born I was pregnant again. That sent me into my first depression. After moving back to Michigan from South Carolina, my family of 4 lived with my parents in a 2 bedroom apartment for 4 years where I got pregnant again and was fired from my job for being pregnant. That brought on depression number 2. Experiencing emotional and sometimes verbal abuse caused me to be clinically diagnosed depressed for the first time. Being divorced after being cheated on and cheating, and going through Hell I was diagnosed depressed again! I fight depression every single day! Am I perfect NO! Do I lose some days YES! But I get up the next morning and I fight even harder. Here is my point, whatever feelings, emotions, situations, or issues you feed that's what will grow. As long as you justify your depression, your anxiety, your stress and your fears they will consume you! The moment you take a stand and say I will bless The Lord at all times, I will not be defeated, my faith will not be shaken today, just watch how that thing turns around. We've all been through the fire. But fire purifies us so we can be fit to be used by God! You have to change your perspective! You should not be consumed by the storm if the creator of it is your Father.