GOOD INTENTIONS!

Has your spouse ever done something that hurt you and made you feel unloved? But after discussing it you discovered that was not at all the intention behind his action. My husband and I are from completely different worlds. Where I'm from almost everyone has a hidden motive. Trust is hard to come by and you always have to listen for the hidden meaning in a persons words. If their actions don't line up with the words they speak then it is assumed that they don't have your best interest at heart. My husband on the other hand comes from a place where everybody helps everybody. They will give all they have to help you, even if it means they go lacking. And you better take it! The only motive they have is love. I'm from the big city where you ALWAYS have to watch your back and he is from the small country where EVERYONE has your back. Our individual culture and environment colored the glasses we view the world and EACH OTHER through.

My husband always sees the good and gives everyone the benefit of good will and doesn't expect that there is any negativity unless it is expressed. My environment wasn't conducive for me to catch the revelation of goodwill, so when my husband does something that doesn't line up I automatically look for the negative intent.  Understanding good will for me meant that in my relationship even though my husband may do things that don't seem like he loves me or feel like he loves me I give him the benefit of good will because I know his intention was good. God gave me a God fearing man, one that strives daily to love me like God commanded him to. And while his actions may sometimes miss the mark, or I may misinterpret his actions, that speaks to our flawed being and not to his love and good will or good intent towards me!

Think of it this way, we are created in God's image therefore we carry his DNA. When we accept Him He gives us a new heart (His heart) and a renewed mind. So we take on God's nature. God's intention toward is always good. It doesn't always look good and it certainly doesn't always feel good but it works for the good!

Giving my husband the benefit of good will is huge for me. It changes the color of the glasses I view him through, it's a complete change in perspective! Just imagine how many arguments, hurt feelings, and emotional roller coasters can be avoided by having this perspective. Rather than automatically seeing the negative and being hurt, this perspective automatically says, even though that didn't seem loving I know he isn't trying to hurt me. Then I can go to my husband and say I know you have good will towards me but when you did what you did it didn't portray your intention so can you tell me what you meant by what you did. <<< That's a game changer! Because it closes the door to arguments and negativity. It's one more way to take away the vices satan uses to come between husbands and wives!

We often don't realize how our background and environment shapes us and causes us to react to things in certain ways. I can't stress enough the importance of being completely open, free and flexible to God. Don't be boxed up and rigid and unwilling to change. Just because you've been doing something a certain way all your life doesn't make it right. When God gives fresh revelation allow it to penetrate your heart and change your perspective. You'll be blessed beyond measure.

"Good intentions don't always produce good behavior! Make every effort to let your actions portray your heart"!